Dachstein Training Weekend
Friday, 27 March 2015 – Sunday, 29 March 2015

The journey down was most interesting and educational, with stops to admire Luke’s duck/Rob calling ability, Dan’s rock skimming talent and to fully understand the contrast between cheery Tania and depressing Rob. An entire chicken and loaf of bread was devoured to power a trip down the canal where no interfering occurred. Dan’s driving was most excellent, with many thanks to myself for infallible navigation; quotes include:

‘This biscuit so sweet it’s made me cry?’ ‘Why are there so many lines [road markings]?’ The entirety of SW was filled with the lost boys of industrial Wales and seemingly unrelated blue smoke. After passing ‘Industrial Wales’, scheming of industrial whales, we arrived just in time to escape nightfall. Further chickens were eaten and the idea of communal shewees were shot down.

An exciting day of not caving entailed. Much networking was had by myself and the no other members of ULSA. Organisation went entirely balls up, inspiring everyone for the summer expedition. Dan, Brendan and Tania learnt how to take awesome cave photos, and Joel Corrigan told us all that we were all about to die. A dead bird was found along the traverse in the rafters of the climbing centre to Luke’s upmost amusement. Dan and I sort of fucked about with surveying equipment, while George learnt about the benefits of drugs in caves. Peachey’s past was unravelled. Brendan learnt much on Saturday, such as rebelays and changeovers and how to drive vans. A detailed kit list was administered with example fatalities, which widened our appreciation of the board range of tinfoil shapes available. The evening rounded off with Luke: I don’t want to go in shit caves.

George: Don’t go on expo then.

Everyone got a sound sleep, thinking we’d like to do some actual caving tomorrow… in an artificial cave.

The Sunday followed with more SRT, mid rope rescues with varying success and changeover races. The artificial cave was deemed out of boards for no apparent reason. After deciding we’d done pretty much everything, eaten as much as we could and annoyed everyone with expedition related questions, we left. The weekend was rounded off with a heartfelt hug from Joel Corrigan. Smashing.